


fuck a fake smile

by imaslutforsasukee



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Angst, Inspired by Music, M/M, Mentally, Post-Timeskip, Slightly Out Of Character, iwaoi - Freeform, mature for the mature themes, not phsyically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-16 07:55:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29572818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaslutforsasukee/pseuds/imaslutforsasukee
Summary: “here’s the thing,” shoyo tells him across the line. “you’re in love with a version of a person that you’ve created in your head that you are trying to but cannot fix.”toru stares at himself in the mirror with glossy eyes. “uh, the only person you can fix is yourself.”
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Kudos: 15





	fuck a fake smile

**Author's Note:**

> sorry <3

“here’s the thing,” shoyo tells him across the line. “you’re in love with a version of a person that you’ve created in your head that you are trying to but cannot fix.”

toru stares at himself in the mirror with glossy eyes. “uh, the only person you can fix is yourself.” 

the glass seems to shatter, stabbing toru with a million different blades at once. 

“i love you. this has gone on way too long. enough is enough.” toru stares at his hands, then his phone, then himself once again. 

“i’m coming over.” 

and the conversation ends just like that. shoyo ends the call, most likely about to start the drive to toru’s house. 

except that isn’t what toru wants - he needs iwa-chan. he needs kind, supportive iwa-chan who’s been with him for years, constantly at his side. he needs the iwa-chan who never fails to lecture him. 

what toru doesn’t need or want is hajime. 

the truth hurts, and when it finally sinks in, it sinks to the bottom, taking you with. it gives you a suffocating feeling. the feeling of a broken heart is worse than anything else toru has ever experienced.

it doesn’t help that hajime is on the other side of the world.

toru painted a picture of hajime, and as his art progressed, it strayed further and further from the initial design. instead of looking at a reference, toru saw what he wasn’t physically seeing, and scribbled it onto there. while everyone else saw a demon, toru saw a wingless angel. 

throughout this entire phiasco, toru learned that his imagination is very large. 

toru wanted their relationship to grow, and hajime to grow as a person, but he wasn’t budding. it’s a shame that hajime felt the need to emotionally push toru to his limits instead of giving his own personality an ounce of attention. 

what toru saw was the potential, but not the credentials. toru thought that his precious iwa-chan was somebody else, but he is only hajime.

hajime should be the one sobbing at midnight in his dimly lit bathroom, because toru invented hajime. he’s the reason hajime wears gucci tennis shoes and lives in “luxury.”

toru figured that, in the end, they’d be able to work it out. however, hajime seems to use his fancy kicks to run from all of their issues. 

ever since they were kids, hajime kept toru in his orbit, despite him being a hard one to please. he prioritized toru when, in reality, he never got his issues in the right order. 

in reality, hajime hates it when toru gets too emotional. he’d rather his body than half of his heart. he knows that toru’s love is a curse, making him head over heels. 

toru always insists hajime listen to his propositions, though he dismisses them all.

“no offense.” 

and, yeah, sometimes toru would rather be alone. sometimes, toru would rather use his covers to stay warm. time apart is beneficial, but maybe they took a little too much time away from one another. 

toru would fuck with hajime just to make up with him, because, usually, at the end of the day, they would be back to normal. but, like everything in life, all good things must end.

if only toru had admitted it all much sooner on. 

“we’ll get through this.”

“you guys will get past it!”

“you’re a strong guy. don’t worry, oikawa.”

these conversations hurt like no others. eventually, it gets hard to fake a smile, and after the laughter comes tears. 

fuck fake smiles.


End file.
